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I am not sure when it happens or why it happens but at some point in time very few things matter but the people that surround you each and everyday and unconditionally think that you are an okay individual. I have learned over the last year especially, that relationships change, relationships evolve and you can fight it, you can question it but inevitably you can't change it. I am a very different person than before I had children, not better, not worse, just different.

Why tonight do I sit an share these thoughts on this blog, I don't know. How is that for an answer. Is it because I am looking forward toward a first birthday party that I so much want to be excited for but deep down inside I am sad that my little guy is hitting this milestone? Is it because my little girl told me tonight "I love you so much" and it made me realize that her love, her brothers love and her fathers love are more important to me today than they were yesterday? Is it because I have two sick babies and I feel so helpless in their fight to feel better?

Helpless...I have had that feeling more than once this past year, but as new friendships have grown, old friendships have changed and I have settled into the fact that after almost 7 years, this is who I am, helpless is merely a feeling it will come and it will go. I need to give myself more credit and the people around me more credit. 2010 brough superior highs and "bubble bursting" lows and as I look toward this next year I will continue the fight and remember always that I am surround by love.....so much love!

Okay....I am done with the babbling, get used to it though, I am going to try to blog more often than once a month--my thoughts are often random. Hold on : )

Jasper getting ready to eat "snow ice cream!"

Danica playing in the snow!